Killing Daughters Cannot Redeem Honour

Honour killing is residual of the tribal culture of jahilia or the benighted society that existed in Arabia before the advent of Islam as well as elsewhere before the dawn of civilized life.. As a matter of fact the prophet is credited with giving women equal status with men. That also stopped the otherwise widespread practice of girls being buried alive at birth. It is indeed a modest claim that Islam did deter this abominable practice. It also stopped the intra tribal fights which claimed a heavy toll on humanity. So as an organized attempt of a newly emerged religion this was a wonderful achievement. Many were drawn to it because of these humanitarian blessings. However, bestial nature and instinctive behaviour cannot be an excuse to blame Islam or any religion. Religions have come in the world to improve social and individual life of the people. No religion should be blamed for a practice which it avowedly tried to abolish through preaching and practice.

A majority of the people who reacted to the murder of Rand Abdel Qader 17 year old Iraqi by her father did not mention Islam. Their primary concern was humanitarian. Her love for the British soldier is a human quality. For that she should not have been killed. Many are dismayed that the British soldiers should have had more civilizing effect on the people to have prevented such an incident. This pious feeling is paralleled by the concern of the prophet at the birth of Islam. Then why did this aberration take place. It could be that the father felt that his family’s respect was compromised by her truant behaviour. What would others think about him and his progeny must have driven him to outrage. But as a person true to his faith he could have abided by observing patience in the time of tribulation. That could have healed what he believed outrage until a better day when his daughter could have proved to be more obedient and observant of certain practices which would have redeemed her. She could still have lived a life of piety and become the sources of forgiveness for the family as a whole. May be she could have won over her outsider husband to her faith. This interpretation of the complex situation would have been far more honourable than the fate she met. This would also have carried with it the injunction of keeping patience where you can’t help for Allah does see what you otherwise cannot see.

A second reason could be political. Iraq is under occupation. Since 2003 hardliners have taken over the society which under Saddam Hussein was the most educated and tolerant in the whole Middle East in matters relating to women. The hardliners take a stricter and punitive view of women. Why not an ameliorative view as is often the practice laid down by the prophet himself and those who lived around his time. But the people now fail to understand that the women alone should not be expected to carry the badge of honour of the culture they live in. A male Iraqi in love with an American soldier would have gone on without any furor and certainly no stigma. Perhaps they could marry later when the hubbub settles down. So, is Rand Abdel Qader another casualty of the war in Iraq?

Why has the transition from Jahilia to Islam and to this wonderful world of today where human rights predominate everything failed to root out honour killing? Talking of the faith it is positive aspect that a rainbow of choices is available in matters of faith. Some verge on extremism and others on sobriety. The much discussed jihad for example is noblest when one soberly controls himself or does not allow his self to override other things. The other options range in extreme passions.

Such extreme passions were the undoing of the father, Abdel Qader Ali. Someone told him that his daughter was talking with the 22 year old British, Paul. He rushed home and strangulated her. He stood on her throat like a colossus until she breathed her last. He shouted that he was cleansing the honour of his family. His terrified wife rushed out and since then is in hiding. Then with his sword he stabbed her repeatedly even when there was no life left in her. Each of the thing he did and said permanently damns him because his insane rage stifled out reason which the prophet had praised and wanted others to emulate. How could the father forget the sober counsel in despair of inallahe maasaberin, Allah is with those who keep patience? This Ali bears the name of the son in law of the prophet. That Ali was the most powerful of his time. Once a man spat on him. In his anger he could have finished the other by a single blow. He practiced the noble jihad of controlling himself and then forgiving the other.

That Rand was not given normal burial and that her uncle spat on her body speak of the raw passions which in fact Islam arose to check. This is tragically ironic that the infantry soldier Paul had had no physical contact with her, no holding of hands, or kissing let alone anything beyond this. "She never did anything more than talk to him," said Zeinab, her friend and confidant. "She was proud to be a virgin and had a dream to give herself to the man she loved only after her marriage."

Rand was a student of English and had worked for charity for displaced families. She was charmed by the blond appearance of the soldier. He gave her small gifts, like cuddly toys. Caring is loving. That turned out to be his fault if not an outright crime. Her friend Zeinab would tell her of the difficulty of an alliance with a Christian. This failed to dent her resolve.

What is most agonizing is the attitude of the relatives as well as the authorities. Rand’s mother Leila Hussein reportedly told that she had called out for her two brothers so they could get their father away. But when he told them the reason, instead of saving her they helped him end her life. The father was of course arrested and then released within a short time, within two ours. His wife has got divorced and fears reprisal because a man divorced by his own wife is looked down upon in that country. But what about Rand who could not bear to “hurt a petal on rose”!

A week that saw another bizarre incident in which a man in Austria kept his daughter under his thralldom for 24 years as his mistress and fathered seven children upon her speaks volumes of how man is still in the dark ages in his treatment of woman. Which society is more evolved and which is less evolved is unclear. How many messengers of god have come to inform and reform human beings! But the condition of woman has not changed much.